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10 Ways to be good to yourself

“Self-love, self-respect, self-worth: There’s a reason they all start with ‘self.’ You can’t find them in anyone else.” ~Unknown

Many think that it is selfish if you spend time with yourself, or you focus on yourself and what you want. But making yourself a priority in your own life is not selfish, but necessary. You should be the most important person to yourself. How you love yourself is the key to your happiness and the success of your other relationships. 

How do you achieve self-love?

It’s when you approach your relationship with yourself like you would a relationship with the love of your life. Loving yourself means that you prioritise yourself, communicate lovingly with yourself, trust yourself, being nice and forgiving towards yourself, as well as practicing self-care through healthy habits.  Loving yourself means investing in yourself and deeply caring for yourself physically and mentally. 

10 Ways to self-love:

Very often we are cruel, impatient, irritated, and unhappy with ourselves. We forget how important loving and taking care of ourselves is. Try the tips below to start a loving relationship with yourself. 

1.     Practice continuous improvement in your daily life.

We feel more confident when we feel like we know and understand things. Upskill yourself and improve your daily life on a regular basis. Take small steps. If you, for example, want to eat healthier or practice self-care, start by cutting down on something small each day. For example, eating 1 chocolate less or actually opening that book and reading one sentence daily. A small step will turn into bigger ones on your route to caring for yourself. If you equip yourself daily, you invest in yourself which will promote self-care and self-love. 

2.     Count your blessings

Start each day being grateful for who you are and what you have. When you do this, you begin to have a positive outlook each day. Look into the mirror in the morning and give yourself at least 5 compliments. Things like “You look beautiful” or “You’ve got a nice smile” etc, are all things your mind needs to hear out loud. You will start viewing yourself in a more positive way if you repetitively attempt to compliment yourself. 

3.     Forgive yourself

Don’t be too hard on yourself. If you feel like you’ve disappointed yourself or you’ve missed an opportunity, don’t obsess over it. Learn to accept it and forgive yourself. We all mess up at one point or another. It is what it is. Have some compassion for yourself. Stop blaming yourself over and over and just forgive yourself with the notion that you will try to do better in future. 

4.     Practice Healthy Habits

No one will take care of your body or health on your behalf because no one really knows what you need, except you. Make sure you eat healthy, exercise daily, get enough sleep, maintain a work-life balance, look after your mental and emotional health, and take care of your entire being. 

5.     Think positive and practice positive self-talk

Constantly self-motivate by thinking positive and talking to yourself in a constructive positive manner. Refrain from thinking “I’m stupid” or “Why can’t I just get it right” or “I always fail.” Learn to take the positive out of situations and focus on what you can learn from the mistake rather than the actual mistake. When your emphasis falls on how you can improve yourself, you will become much more self-aware and emotionally intelligent. 

6.     Set boundaries and make time for yourself

It’s so easy to get the lines blurred between work and your personal life, as well as your social life and your personal time. Set clear boundaries and make time to spend alone with yourself or doing something you want to do. You are entitled to some downtime. Time where you can just be with yourself. It is not selfish, but necessary. 

7.     Rediscover the original you

With all the work and daily life hassles, it is so easy to lose ourselves. Take time to rediscover who you are and your passions. Discover what makes you, you, and what’s unique about you. Stress and burnout can sometimes leave us feeling numb which makes it important to make time to pinpoint why you even started what you are doing. It makes us doubt our abilities and makes us lose the passion we once had. 

8.     Mix with the right crowd

Having a positive mentor who constantly motivates you, guides you and keeps you on track is a good place to start. Find people who are good for you. If you surround yourself with toxic and negative people, they will drag you down with them. Choose your friends wisely. Choose who you spend time with wisely. Choose whom you listen to wisely. Negativity as with positivity is contagious and people who build you up will help your positive self-talk and to love yourself. 

9.     Learn to trust yourself

Take charge of your thoughts and beliefs about yourself. Trust yourself to know that you are capable of success. Don’t doubt your abilities and learn to turn what you think your weaknesses are, into areas of improvement. Don Miguel Ruiz said “With self-love, you are no longer afraid to face responsibilities in your life, to face problems and resolve them as soon as they arise. Why? Because you can trust yourself completely to make choices that support you, and you never set up circumstances that go against you.”

10. Don’t wait, make it happen

Many people wait for an opportunity to cross their life path. Don’t wait. Don’t delay. You have the power to make it happen. Go after what you want or what’s important to you. If you just sit around and wait for “the right time”; “the perfect job”; “a loving relationship” you are going to postpone living. You will go into self-pity mode which will spiral your thoughts even more to think you are not good enough. 

Start by taking small steps to practice loving yourself. Try taking one of the above points at a time and try to do it well, before you move on to the next one. This way you are constantly improving your own love for yourself.  “I was looking for someone to inspire me, motivate me, support me, keep me focused… Someone who would love me, cherish me, make me happy and I realized that all along I was looking for myself.” – leticiarae.com